The Many Adventures of Amy's Life

To blog again or not to blog again....

2010-12-23T10:50:00.000-08:00

This is the REAL question.

I'm back............

2010-03-27T04:01:00.000-07:00

Madder and Fatter than EVER!

Let me explain
This past January I had a baby! There he is but that is not why I am mad. Infact he is GREAT. His Dad and big Brother were praying for him! I think it was to balance the house out a little.

I am mad becuase I am fatter than EVER!! The baby is supposed to put on the weight NOT ME!!

I know what you are saying, I can hear you now! "Your supposed to put on weight when you are preggers and you will drop the weight, it just melts off when you are nursing"

HAHA Not for me!

The whole time I was "with child" I did great and even lost a few pounds. But when baby was hospitalized I throw my hands in the air and eat anything I wanted. At first it was just to make it through the long nights in the hospital. BUT he got better and stronger and they sent him home.

So you would think that I would go back to eating well and getting back on track. Nope I kept eating and eating. Snacks in bed with the hubby and movie.....we have long nights of no sleep.

Now I decided to step on the scale. Here is where the mad part comes.

Dang you Girls Scouts and your UBER YUMMY cookies.

305.4

What?!?! You mean I can not eat anything I want, When I want, and how much I want.

Ok so here it is. Back to work, losing the weight and working through the food issues.

Are you along for the ride?

Kindergarden Hooray

2009-08-25T08:53:00.000-07:00

Lily was just not ready to For Jorie and Xavier and Jorie to leave for school.

Xavier was ready to go. He was not to happy that I was taking pictures,

Beauty Secrets for those with no hair…as demonstrated by Lily.

2009-08-11T09:10:00.000-07:00

Do this every happen to anyone else?

2009-01-15T11:55:00.000-08:00

It has been weeks ....literally that I have gotten any real sleep.
So yesterday after the grocery shopping was done, Jorie was at young women's, the kids were asleep and my darling husband was entertained watching the Laker game, I decided that I would run a hot bath put yummy smelling stuff in it that I got for Christmas and try to melt away my bad mood.

I grab an Austin book....Pride and Prejudice and just slide in the tub when there is a knock on my door.
"Mom" I hear my Jorie. I can tell she thinks I am asleep.
I wait for a minute considering that idea and just HOW much I would love a few minutes ALONE!! Then like most mom's I rethink that and asks her what she wants.
She OPENED MY DOOR and sat on the vanity bench. So much for my undisturbed hot bath.
Then she starts talking a mile a minute.
We talked about school, boys that she has a crush on (she is making plans already on who will be "good enough" for her first date) then she asked me about church things.
She asked me how I handle a situation when you are stuck with someone that you just can not like.

To tell the truth I was irritated by the question. There was no one at the moment that I felt like i could get along with. But I took a deep breath and told her just to pray for that person, then maybe the spirit will help you to find a way to work together.

I knew the answer was not all that profound and I knew I was missing a chance to share and teach her but I could not get over my own flawed nature. She sat there for several minutes deep in her own thoughts. I keep thinking "leave leave leave" trying to will her out of the room and give me a few minutes.

Then she surprised me! "Mom I am going to try my hardest to make sure you don't have to pray for me so much"

I was shocked "wait what. Jorie. No I love you and I really like you...."

She put one hand up and said "mom I know. It's just that I can be difficult...well a snot and since this other person is giving me a hard time lately I think I understand what you mean about 'it is not what you say it is how you say it"

I did not know what to say to her. Me speechless. It was an odd feeling. I was wrapped in my towel, red eyed from lack of sleep and completely in awe of my 15 year old daughter and her amazing wisdom. At that moment my attitude changed and I was completely humbled.

I realized that in the end it is all worth it. The lack of sleep, the personal time you sacrifice, the heartache and the guilt. It goes fast but if you do your job and pray of them. They will surprise you.

I still have to say though it would be nice to be able to have a bath ALONE LOL

In need of a serious Attitude Adjustment!

2009-01-14T06:29:00.000-08:00

As a kid we called them AA.
If someone was having a bad day we would say "you need AA"
Who knew what the REALLY meant....we were kids!

This week I find myself in SERIOUS need for AA!!!
The kicker is I have no idea why!
Really most things in life I should not be complaining about but yet everything is annoying me.

Is it just me?

Must be!

Come on!

2009-01-13T11:54:00.000-08:00

I am really sick of being the fat girl...seriouly I am over it.

People Suck

They are rude.

Like I would just choose to be this over weight.

.....well I guess I did make the choice......

Ahhhhh!!!!

Seriously?

2009-01-09T17:38:00.000-08:00

I really hate dumb questions.

Teacher say things like "the only dumb question is the one you didn't ask."

Well they might be teachers but there are ....oh so WRONG!

I get a call *person to stay anonymous to protect their identities*

The call went something like this

ME: Hello

Anny: Hey how are you

ME: Good

Anny: I am just wanting to know how much weight you have lost?

Here I am thinking oh so nice, I need LOTS of support but wow what a way to start a conversation!

2008 Wrapped up with a “bigger” Red Bow!

2009-01-01T09:29:00.000-08:00

Well this is the first day of 2009 and I have not blogged much in this last month so I thought I would take a minute to wrap up the year.

First the confession. I have cheated since Thanksgiving. I gained 3 pounds and I sort of don't care. I decided that I will get back on track starting today and get a goal for August to get my tummy tuck and boob job...sounds reasonable right???? Anyone...anyone

Alright so here is a quick run down.

First my parents came out for Turkey day. That was way fun. We played with dinosaurs. Xavier loved it when Grandma got "spitted on" by the poison spitting dinosaur!!! There might be a potential issue there somewhere with him!

Then not only does Lily decide to start walking at 10 months old, she thought it a grand idea to help with the dishes!

Then Prosper Eagles. Went to the state Championships and WON!! Let's go EAGLES!!! The kids got to play in Texas Stadium. Jorie had a great time. The even got to go to the game in charter buses. Fancy That!!

The kids had a great time. The game was exciting and it will be the last games played in the stadium.

Blow Jorie Blow!!!

Then we were packed and off to Sunny California but only it was not so sunny.... It rained!!!!

We had a great time. We spent time with our friends Kelly and her kids. Jorie spent the night with them.

We ate GOOD Mexican food!!!

I got to have breakfast with Vicky. It was to short to catch up all the way but I am grateful that we had a chance to talk and see each other.

We met a new cousin Johnny and new aunts. Xavier fell in love with them!!

Then the girls took me out to try Pink Berry. Wow that was fun! I love you guys. Makes me a little homesick. I am glad we saw you. Thank you so much Kelly for putting that together! I miss you so much thanks for "yogurt?" :)

Then the best news of all came after we come home. Last night Heather and Andrea announced that they are having as baby!!! Hurray another baby in the family and I don't have to give birth!!! I am so happy for them!! AWESOME!!!

So now 2009 looks like it should be very interesting.

Keep reading to find out.

I love you all and I hope everyone has a wonderful 2009 and remember just because I am in Texas and you are in California, Michigan, New York etc. I will be there for ANYTHING you need!!! I am just a phone call away.

2 am and I am up????

2008-11-25T00:06:00.000-08:00

What is that about?
I am not sure. I am not even a little tired.
My head is full of thoughts, a few worries and many memories.

From time to time people will send me those silly questionnaires that you are supposed to give an answer and post. You know like the ones that are “100 things about yourself” or what is your favorite...whatever and this and that. Well I never do them. I figure…. why.

I guess in some ways if you looked at my life you might be like “wow she had it hard”. At least that is what a friend told me that has known me since I was 9 years old.

I was a little taken back. Hard was my life hard? I am a brat. I do cry a lot I guess you would say. I have a hard time letting people really know me. I hate asking for help, but hard. I never thought that my lot was hard. It was just my life.

So today I pilled out some old journals and stories I have written over the years (there was a time when I was going to be a famous writer). Wow did reading my journal that I wrote when I was 15 make me laugh. My journal when I was 24 made me sob. Last my journal while 19 and a new mommy made me feel guilty.

Anyway, to say I had a hard life I would disagree. I would say more it was a life of pulling me and stretching me into a better person. I am so far from perfect that I am not even sure I even know what perfect is but I do know one thing and that is this: I am grateful.

I am grateful for the single mom I had. I am grateful that I was allowed to dye my hair blue when I was a teenager. I am grateful that I was raised in a very large catholic family who hated that I was Mormon. I am grateful for 3 amazing young women leaders who held on to me so tight that I am now active as an adult. I am grateful that I had Jorie. I am grateful that I made mistakes by getting married to a man that I did not know at the age of 17 only to find myself alone and divorced a few short years later. I am grateful I grew up in Flint Michigan. I am glad Maryann Gerics was MY grandmother. I am grateful that my husband came to Flint Michigan to go to College. I am glad that we broke up so he could serve a mission. I am grateful that after I hurt him he come home, after his mission, to marry me in the temple and then later adopt Jorie. I am grateful for my daughter Lindsey who was so perfect and there was a greater need for her on the other side of the veil. I am grateful for Jorie, Xavier, Eleanor and Lillian.

Therefore, you see I could go on and on but there is not a hard life laid out but rather one filled with more blessings and love then any one person really deserves.

Twilight + 12:02 a.m. = awesome mommy points x 10

2008-11-21T07:11:00.000-08:00

So.......... I saw Twilight with my Jorie this morning.

If you are thinking it ...she still made it to seminary on time and then school.

So why did I stand in line for hours, get home and in bed after 3am, and still get up dressed to take all kids to seminary (on time) this morning......hmmm maybe after a nap I can better answer that!!

The movie was...GOOD! I resisted the books cause I thought they were to "young" but the move was good.

the best part the movie was , Jorie and I laughed and had a great time together.

The older she gets the less I see her. I miss her. She is still home and I know it sounds funny but she is never around and when she is she seldom needs me. So it was nice to spend the evening just her and I.

She is growing up!

The best song angry song in a long time

2008-11-17T07:04:00.001-08:00

Leave it to Pink to make the best song to workout !!!

Seriously this song can make me so what to "get into a fight" that I love it.

I work out harder then ever!!

What a way to get you heart pumping in less that a minute FLAT!!

My own addition to the song.

"I guess I just lost my calories......I don't know where they went."

I am so a rock star when I listen to this song!!

All the times I made the treat

2008-11-12T11:07:00.000-08:00

My scale decided to find it's way to an early grave!!!

And to think I was trying to be nice to the stupid thing and lose weight so I would not make its poor "back" hurt....

Oh well guess I can only say..I think I have lost weight????

ATTACKS On the MORMON CHURCH

2008-11-07T05:55:00.000-08:00

This is a picture outside the LA Temple last night.

We have been warned and now we face a test.

We have been told to Be steadfast and immovable Mosiah 5:15. How important this theme is for our youth this year!!!!!

We need to not give in. The fight might have just started but we are strong. We can also pray that it will end in peace but we MUST LISTEN TO THE PROPHETS VOICE!

Does anyone know when the last time a temple was shut down like this? Now they are planning to do it again and to also shut down the Salt Lake Temple

http://www.sltrib.com/Faith/ci_10918202?source=rv

If you have not heard about what happened in LA Yesturday please read this

http://www.latimes.com/news/local/la-me-protest7-2008nov07,0,3827549.story

Here is the terrible video being run about us.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q28UwAyzUkE

I know this has nothimg to do with my diet but it has very thing to do with who I am......This is Satan hard at work against us.

Please sisters share this blog. Not for one moment should it be ok to shut down one of our temples!!!

I'll be home for Christmas

2008-11-05T08:35:00.001-08:00

So yes I will be home and YES I want to get together with everyone.

If someone plans it I will come.

Oh and I so cheating ...get it got it good.

Now that it is over

2008-11-03T09:00:00.000-08:00

Halloween that is.
It is time to get back on the diet!

So this morning I get up and take a shower.....by the WAY...Seminary is soooo early!!

While in the shower I realize that to day I must get back into the diet.....bummer no singing Prince songs in my loofah now!!

I get back from seminary to find my amazing husband wake and making a full gut busting breakfast....I guess I forgot to get him the memo on the "return of Amy's diet"

The menu
Red potatoes sauteed with onion and red bell peppers.
Thick cut Bacon
Eggs over medium
and toast.

YUMMY. So I ate it.....and it was good!!!

Wait now, come on, how many times does your husband get up and make such an awesome breakfast on a work day ....how could I break his fragile ego.....I mean he would have been so disappointed!!

Alright I know it is thin.....alright alright I am using my husband as a scapegoat. :)

SO

I get on the scale right......and I close my eyes not waiting to look.

LooK...Amy you know the truth face it (this is what I am telling myself)

Then I only half look. One POUND I only gained one pound??????

There is something wrong with my scale.

So the phone rings and it is Ami or (I) as I call her. All the while I am on and off the scale.

Nope only pound is all that I put back on.

Booyah CANDY in your FACE!!!
I am so shakin it today!!!

Now back to the exercises. ...... well maybe I will start Tuesday!

MIA or just out having fun and not sharing with all of YOU!!!

2008-10-31T07:47:00.001-07:00

She's BACK!!!
Did you miss me?
Really How much??

Let me first by saying Kelly H I love you!! I am back and things are rockin!

So are you wondering what I was doing?

Hmmmm should I share?
OF COURSE!

Well my baby brother! Got married!!!!

Not only that they met their new niece for the first time!

MaryAnn is great! She is such an awesome addition to the family. She is so very good for my brother. The only downside is that they live so far away. :)

So the story goes.
Dave, I, and the little guys drove from Texas to Michigan.

We stopped and stayed the night in Nauvoo. We have been there 3 other times but I still love it so much and look forward to going again.

We made it to Michigan where we stayed with my sister and Ken. That was awesome. I talked and talked with Mel. Now since I have been home I have REALLY missed her!!

There was a bridal shower

The rehearsals and family party.

Then my brother!! He gathered the family to give out what I thought were the gifts for the wedding party and parents but he also surprised me with a green Pearl set and cake for my birthday. He cried and said some really awesome things about me and then I cried!! Thanks Paul. I Love you!! What a GREAT Birthday gift!!!

Then the wedding. I cried and cried.

Then the best part! The reception. Ready for it? I was the bar tender!!!!
The person who was supposed to be there to manage the bar did not make it so I stepped in. The funny part is I was making the craziest things and I made $102.00 in tips!! What the only Mormon in the place tending the bar.
My mom and the bride were kept from tears and stress so that is why I did it. So no one freak out at me!! Seriously.
But I do have a new skill lol

There was lots of family but the one that I owe some serious thanks to is my Aunt Julie. Everyone needs to be blessed with an Aunt Julie!! I love you. She helped out so much that weekend. She is awesome!

Mom and Dad. Mom had to let her baby boy become a man. I think she did a great job. Paul grew up to be a great man.

I could not help but to include this. Here is my little man dancing away at Uncle Pauls wedding. On the way home he decided that he wanted to get married so he could do some dancing!!! NOT TILL AFTER THE MISSION YOUNG MAN!

Then it was time to say good bye. We cried and cried. There were times, over the years, I felt like the outsider but this time I felt like the big sister again. I really do love my family! I love that we have lots of problems and that we are so different! I love that we can call on each other and pull together when we need too. I love that the four siblings are friends. REAL friends. I really miss you guys. Even after being gone as long as I have and having my own kids I miss playing camp out in the back yard. I miss having concerts in the driveway. I miss Thorina's hiphop music. I miss getting to eat all Melissa's topping off her pizza. I miss picnics in the living room. I miss trying to get Paul to take the blame because "mom would go easy on him". I miss singing Osmond songs on the record player. I miss sing camp songs as loud as we could. I guess you could say that I really miss my family!

I love you guys!

The four Lester Kids!!

The best part of it all was my husband. He takes anything that my family can throw at him. He was in the wedding. He cooked a BBQ dinner for the rehearsal dinner and he made sure that I was able to spend every minute with my family. I love you sweetheart!

No pounds gone BUT

2008-09-22T09:25:00.000-07:00

A few more articles of clothes are WAY to big!

oh yeah I am happy today!

When I think of all the TIMES!!!!!!

2008-09-19T09:51:00.000-07:00

I wanted to throw my stupid scale.
I never did I was even nice to it a kept losing weight so that the stuip thing would work less and less
Then what does it do to me
I BREAKS!!!

I do so don't "Love Technology"

AHHHH

I was so mad..was???? I still am.

Now how can I do a buggie dance!!

Lame Sauce!! AHHH now I sould like my crazy daughter and brother - in -law.

LOL there are worse things in life right!!!

Lily sums it all up for me for today

2008-09-11T11:09:00.000-07:00

Dude, Dude, DUDE

2008-09-09T11:52:00.000-07:00

That was all I could say when I looked at the scale this morning!

I know I sound like my 14year old but, for real, DUDE

Are you ready to know what I am "duding" about?

Are you sure?

Ready?

I weighted this morning 279.1
Can we just all agree, right here, right now, that I rocked it out this week!!!

For those who are keep track.
This is a total of 22.5 pounds lost!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I think I am buying a Prince CD. a collection of old an new and strut around a little bit!!

Oh yeah!!!!!!!!!!!!! go me!!

AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH

I am so excited!!!

Gotta go...do ......something.......can't sit still now!!!!

Why I ate Oreo Cookies Sunday night

2008-09-08T09:30:00.001-07:00

You ever have one of those weeks?

You know where you want to throw your hands in the air and yell I quit, or just cry and cry till the snot is running down your nose and your face is red and puffy?

That was my week!

The kids got sick I took them to the doc to get meds, kept them in the house and blah blah blah. Friday we decided to take the kids to the mall and let them play around in the play area and get dinner. We even hit the Disney Store cause mom felt bad for them having been stuck in the house all week.

Then Saturday while at Wal-mart my DH (Darling Husband) finds me in the store, after taking Xavier to the bathroom,

Dave: Honey look at his tummy I think he is braking out.

Amy : (Rolling my eyes) can I just look at him in the car? ( Thinking I am in a store not a place I want take my kids clothes off)

Dave; It looks bad

Amy: Fine. It just looks like red ant bites.

Then I run everyone through the store and home to get stuff on mom's to -do list done.

Then at 3:00pm I find Xavier in the bath AGAIN! I tell him to get out and notice he looks red.

I take a second look.

He looks horrible.

He wants to sleep he said.

I run outside and yell for Dave to come in.

We take him to the Urgent Care.

HE IS ALLERGIC TO AMOXICILLIN!

What!

Now he needs an eppy shot!

Bad mommy.

We get some meds and instructions and they let us come home.

I have to shave his head because we need to get the meds on his head.

Oh the screaming.

"I hate my hair like this. It is to little. I like it big!"

Then dad saves the day and Shaves his off also!!

Sunday

He wants to got to church! He was supposed to say the prayer in Primary. So we take him. Even though he looks worse and I know that there will be hundreds of questions and even more looks.

I can't blame anyone!! He looks HORRIBLE

By the time we reached home we was screaming that his feet and hands won't work!!

We call the doctor.

Take him back to the Urgent Care.

He needs more shots and what were we thinking taking him out of the house?

I didn't know. I thought after we left the doc's the first time he would just be itchy and look horrible! I didn't know that if I took him to church, of all places, I would make him worse.

Here is were I wanted to cry.

My poor baby.

I hate these moments. You know, when you realize you could have done more or less to prevent something and you were to busy to do it?

Here is what he looked like after church

His poor eyes almost swelled shut.

But because I have many blessings (most of which I take for granted) my sister-in-law and her husband come over for dinner and then Andre helped my husband give Xavier a blessing.

So why did I eat the Oreos? Who knows. I was still awake after everyone fell asleep and I was cleaning the kitchen and I eat one, worked a little, eat another, then loaded the dishwasher........ best guess is that I eat 8 to 10 before I realized what I did.

OUCH!!!! I hurt

2008-09-05T12:33:00.000-07:00

EVERYWHERE!!!

Thanks Kaye!

I went out and worked my core! She told me too! Therefore, I did…..now I hurt and I want to cry like a pre-schooler who is not used to sharing.

This is what I did….well tried to do. Jorie said I looked more like an injured deer still reeling from the headlights ( Don’t you just love teenagers!! ) and no I did not kill her. It made almost pee my pants with laughter.

1. Bicycle Crunch Exercise
2. Captain's Chair Exercise
3. Ab Crunch on an Exercise Ball
4. Vertical Leg Crunch
5. Long Arm Crunch
6. Reverse Crunch
7. Plank (Hover) Exercise
8. Traditional (Basic) Abdominal Crunch
9. Half Curl
10. Crossover Crunch
11. Seated Oblique Twists with Medicine Ball
12. Oblique Crunch
13. Alternating Supermans

Kaye said work out your core. So I found these in a magazine and tried them. I did not even do that many I was out of breath and sweating like …….gross.
So how is that fair I hurt! It hurts to even breath. When I bend over I hurt like I am about to pop out another kids. Let me tell you….I am not digging the idea of any more kids. AHHHHHHHH it hurts to move….. I don’t even want to get off the computer to go pee it hurts that bad.
And I though PMS made me have serious mood swings. Hmmm this might work of me. I will have to try this again Saturday and see what Sunday is like lol

BTW Kaye thank you for your help. I am determined!

Sick

2008-09-03T20:02:00.001-07:00

Friday the little ones got so sick. Saturday we were in the ER with breathing problems. Sunday ....well it was yucky here at my house. Monday mom and dad were sick. How fun on a Holiday!! Super Duper Fun!

So what does this all mean. I eat and eat! Anything that was easy. That means anything that was not good for me. Pizza, McD's, Taco Bell.

The Good news!

I gained no weight back
We are all better now
I learned that my taste has changed and fast food is not so great.
I still LOVE pizza!!
I noticed how awful I felt when I eat bad.

So now back on track. Start walking in the morning. Oh and clean my house. I have not washed the toilets in 4 days! Gross I have toddlers!!

Little Less Hostile

2008-08-27T13:34:00.000-07:00

So sorry about that rant yesterday.
Wow that was some SERIOUS PMS!
Or at lease lack of snack cakes!!

Today was AWESOME! Yesterday Ami (she rocks) noticed that I am looking slimmer. Then today Ann (she is so great) said that I was looking good. (Love her)
Then K sends me an email that was so awesome. Love you K!

I am so feeling good about this process. I am loving the support I have! Thanks everyone! REALLY I mean that. I don't just say that on any blog ...lol....;)

I have made a choice as Ann said today...."the scale does not tell you everything" She is right. So tonight I will measure everything arms, legs, and waist and post it all. This way I can see a better picture of where I am at!

Also, I am thinking of setting some mini goals. At first I was thinking that I would have a meal of anything that I wanted ...but that is dumb I have a problem with food...need to change that self rewarding system.

So anyone have any ideas?

The weight-in

2008-08-26T11:41:00.000-07:00

I HATE THEM!!!

yup I am screaming this like a 2 year-old that got the package of cookies taken away and put on a shelf that is out of reach!

I am on .5 pounds down. Make sure you read that right that was only 1/2 a pound.

IT SUCKS! That could just be the difference in what I am wearing or a glass of water.

OK set the stage. I am mad or annoyed at the very least about the weight. I am thinking I will skip lunch but I don't.

Then I start reading news and looking at various things and oh my I almost blew a gasket.
LOOK at this ridiculous article that I found!!
http://www.reuters.com/article/latestCrisis/idUSN11372238
ARE YOU SERIOUS!!!!!!

What are they thinking! Ahhh this is why I am fat JUSTIFICATIONS!!!

I would love to cause the writer of the article, the editor, and the researchers, to have shaken baby syndrome. Maybe this will make their heads a little more clear. Who prints stupid things like this! Like that makes any sense! PLEASE! That is the smartest thing I have heard all day...NOT

Ok stepping off the "FAT box" Anyone else ..please feel free to sound off....it is just one of those days!!

Oh and Ami you coming over that was fun...ok so I guess the say was not all bad LOL

Ok so I said it

2008-08-21T20:44:00.001-07:00

I want a Boob Job…. On the other hand, is it Brest augmentation?
Stop don’t get all huffy! I know pig men say boob job…but so did I. So, just read out my rational here.

However, you say it I am so getting one!

I am not talking Anna Nicole here but I am talking about having everything put back to where it was when I young and hot. * Oh yeah sister I was once hot. I sometimes cannot believe it myself…so no worries. *

I think I deserve it! Seriously, I have nursed five kids and will have lost an extreme amount of weight. I am not having any more kids *I hope (Heavenly Father please help me out on this one)* so I want to be put things back where they belong…. so to speak.

Yeah yeah I know vain and blah blah. Nevertheless, look at it from my perceptive. For YEARS now, I have been the fat one. I was nice, people liked me but that was as far as it went. I want to be …..HOT again. It is no fun to have your clothes look slumpy, have limited options, Huff and puff up stairs. I want to be like “wow you are in your 30’s…you have how many kids”

Who cares if I am a good friend or fun to be with or any other thing that you say about the less physical attractive. Ok I do want to be a good friend and whatever BUT I, for a little while, what to play on the other side of the fence.

No no let me be even more honest. What I really want is for my husband to have LUSTFUL thought about me when he is at work LOL LOL LOL LOL HAHAHAHA.

No one email me. Dave and I are great but it would be so much better it I felt better about ME. I know you all know what I mean. Married awhile have a few kids. Maybe put on a few unwanted pounds and then WHAM …your not so much feeling good about …..certain things!

AHHHH this is hard to diet. I need to ramp up the exercise. I gotta call K…….. K shout out to ya! HELP

The First Victims

2008-08-19T13:33:00.000-07:00

This morning was so great.
I got a kill first thing.
That always makes for a good day.
Then I got a second kill.
There is nothing better!

Clothes I am talking CLOTHES!

There are now two items that are to big for me!! WOOO WHOOOOO ! !

Granted they were a little big to begin with and get this......you will love this...I refered to them as my "I'm feeling fat today clothes""" HAHAHAHA right? But they are to big. The shirt was flopping all over, the pants were falling down it was SOOOOOOOOOO AWESOME.

Man that feels good.....I feel like bustin into a song "I feel good ..so good... "

This makes me think of that commerical for Nortatrac. " I gave all my fat clothes to my fat friends" HEEHEE

But I won't have any fat friends right? Cause we are all in this together!

OH no I better stop that last comment seemed a little too HIGH SCHOOL MUSICAL !!!

Party on DUDES or rather (followerDieter and friends!)

Bill and TEd ...so much better lol ;)

SO ...how was your weekend?

2008-08-18T06:16:00.000-07:00

Well I didn't cheat on you if that is what you are thinking?

However I have become LUSTFUL for these awesome Wasabi and Soy Sauce Almonds!! Oh am I talking good.

This weekend I had so much energy that I drove my family CRAZY! I loved it! I did not nap with the kids. I watched the Olympics and was movin all over the place! I even get good wife points becuase I packed up all the kids and headed to the mall....not to enjoy the savings of TAX FREE WEEKEND nooooooooooooo it was to wait in the HUGE line at the APPLE store to get my darling husband an Iphone! A month ago there was no way I would have been up for that!

So after that 3 hour fight with the kiddies (they were wiggly and sick of sitting and standing in line) we went shopping!
POWER SHOPPING. Let's just say .....Jorie SUCH a DIVA! That was fun. Xavier, Ella and Lily fell asleep in the stroller so the debt card caught FIRE!

Sunday was an experience in and of itself. Wow those Sunbeams can get you movin. Crazy days in Primary let me tell you! Never knew that going to "the potty" one could work up a sweat!

Any way the long and short of it all..........or just the short and fat for me.....is that I was not thinking of what I could or could not eat! AWESOME. I passed it all up. Even when my kids asked for Cookies, Ice Cream and pretzels all while at the mall.

Update

2008-08-15T07:03:00.000-07:00

This morning the alarm goes off.
6:00 am
Seriously???
I thought this was summer vacation. What happened to sleeping in?
Next thought: Do I have to read my Scriptures today. I tell myself yes...... (I remembered enough to think about it, so yes get up and just do it)
Alma here I come.

Then I put my feet down on the ground expecting there to be pain for the first few minutes but no that is not what I got.

I almost fell over! I thought there were knives or glass on the floor.

Grab the end of the bed. grab the dresser. WOW this hurts!

Now I notice that my lower back is on fire.

Just get to the bathroom.

Feet starting to numb to the pain. Turn on the light AHHHHHHHH oh wait that is me in the mirror!

I feel like saying something nasty.
I frown! I know I was giving myself wrinkles by the furrowed brow but I don't care.

Then there it is the SCALE! I want to pick it up and throw it ....I rethink that ....I might throw my back out instead. So I stand on it.

OH HAPPY DAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Nothing hurts anymore. I dance in the bathroom. I must have yelped a little also, cause I hear a sleepy hubby....."Is everything OK"

I run out jump on the bed! " Wake up" I lose more weight"

But all I got was a " That's great Honey....is it really 6:08?"

I pinch his nose, jump out of bed, and go for a walk! AWESOME it is raining....So I did what I could only do in a situation like this one.

I"'m singing in the rain just singing in the rain what a GLORIOUS feeling I'm happy again."

I come home thank goodness Alma chapter 33 is short! I am not excited to sit still for long.

Then I SCRUB the kitchen! Now if you know my you will understand this : THERE IS NOTHING MESSY ANYWHERE!! NO CLUTTER! LOL

So here is where are I bet you want to know just how much I have lost? 15 POUNDS that is right ladies and gentlemen 15 pounds.

Can we all agree that well ....I RULE !

Because you asked

2008-08-13T05:20:00.000-07:00

OK so I have gotten a few emails with question about various things on my blog so I thought that I would clear a few things up.

1. Yes I did try and find the most unflattering pictures to use. I want to make sure that I really really hate what I look like so I will keep on track! The one of me eating is most appropriate isn't? That's how I got myself in this predicament.

2. I am not on a self hate mission. Just the oppoist if true. I am trying to love myself. Hating myself or at very least not caring about myself is what lead me to 300 pounds. I used to put myself last and now not anymore! I am first, daring! The number one priority and my family is better for it!

3. This is all about the vanity, I want to be SMOKIN HOT! I figure the health is a added bounus. I know I know but really I just want to be SMOKIN HOT again. OH the fun I will have .....of COURSE with my HUSABND.....now were did you let your mind go to! ;)

4. Editing, I am not doing it. I type what I am thinking and post it. If I edit I will that thing out or be like " I can't post that" or "I shouldn't tell people that" So I don't I type it and posted it. We women take self editing to an extreme sometimes. But not here not me. I want to be open and honest. So you can also. If you fell like saying something here post it. I PROMISE there will be only good to come out of it! I promsie no matter what you say I won't gasp to loud.

So there it is. I hope you all know now. Love you. Love me. and shake a tail feather!

I did It

2008-08-12T05:15:00.000-07:00

I posted some pictures. I guess you all know who I look but I just need to make sure I know what I look like.

I was thinking the other day. *Why didn't someone tell me I had gotten so FAT*

Then I quickly thought about how that conversation could have ended. SCARY

I guess I am glad cause I want to keep firends! And no one wants to make the fat girl CRY!

I'm Regular

2008-08-11T04:49:00.000-07:00

Now let's not get carried away. I said nothing about be normal!

I mean regular. For the first time in a long time I am like clockwork.

It is kind of nice! I see why men have a thing for it!

Oh like your husband doesn't TMI sometimes? LOL

Even thought I like being "regular" there are just some words and phrases that I am not going to say ...like....

I have to take my "Daily Constitution"
I need reading material
Wow that smelled
I blow up the toilet

I guess I just did use them.... Well you get it. Those male driven statements that they only find funny.

The 80's

2008-08-10T07:36:00.000-07:00

While the 90's produced some happy dances! The 80's RULE.
And I am not talking ratted hair and Duran Duran cassette tapes (although that is awesome too)! Hmm maybe I'll brake out my "best of the 1980's" CD and shake off a few calories.......where is my leg warmers?

I BROKE into the eighties! I am a happy 289.6.

One word AMAZING!

So now I am going to go to Church with a smile on my face!

*It's Sunday church hymns ......church hymns, hum a church....not Cindy Louper.....

Mother-In-Laws

2008-08-09T14:40:00.000-07:00

What do you do with them?
I mean you are stuck with them forever. In my case for eternity!
You can not get around it, they will be there wanting to know what is going on with your kids, husband (or Wife) anything! That's just how they are.

The great thing for me is that I was LUCKY! I got a great, wonderful, supportive, caring mother-in-law. I really mean that. I could not have wished for a better one. She is not only my mother in law but my friend.

Today I am sick, I feel yucky and I was considering cheating but I check my email and there was an email from her that lifted my spirits and made me want to stick it out even while I am sick and feeling MISERABLE!

I hope she does not mind but I am going to share it with everyone

"Hey Amy,Read Your blog. How honest can you get? I admire that quality. Also so you know, there was no smell, fat or otherwise. Congrats on the ten pound, happy dance right back at you. this is the year, I keep telling everyone. You are going to do it, I just know it. So am I. When we see each other in Dec we are so going to be looking past each other because we can't recognize the slimmer us. Yoohoo! Sorry it hurts. I can say that because I am there. Keep on doing what you are doing, it will be worth it. Love, Nardell, another fan of Amy"

Simple words but it did so much to lift me up when I was weak.

I love you Nardell thanks for being who you are!

10 Freaking POUNDS

2008-08-08T15:43:00.000-07:00

That's right you heard me. I said 10 pounds! I have lost 10 pounds! Oh and yeah I said FREAKING!

When I got on the scale this afternoon I almost peed my pants!

I weighted myself like 10 times and sure enough the scale kept saying 291.7.

I Rock!
I Rule!

I am so going to Download that song...."Don't you wish your girlfriend was hot like me" by that Pussycat Girls or Dolls (I know I am not hip who cares I lost 10 FREAKING POUNDS!) So when I am thin I can crank that song in my car and be all like THAT! LOL

Crack V. Food

2008-08-06T13:18:00.000-07:00

So follow my twisted mind for a minute.

People try crack once and have to fight a life time of addiction. When the kick theyhabit the person has to change their lives. They do not associate with the people they did drug with. They sometimes move. They create new habits to substitute for the drug addition.

BUT

What do you do with food. You can not stop eating. You can not disassociate from the people you eat with. If you move there might be even better restaurants to tempt you. What habbit would your subsitute eating with? So what do you do! I mean OMB (oh my butterflies) I think that Food is a WORSE addition than food.

I just sayin.

To Picture or not to Picture

2008-08-02T15:41:00.000-07:00

Need to decided should I take a picture and posted it.

A good one where I am not hiding behind someone or something.

This way I can really see what I look like.

What do you think?

I cheated

2008-08-02T15:30:00.000-07:00

I did I will admit

Wait now it is not like you have never done it! We went out for Breakfast and .....well there was Irish Food and..... well like..... well....stop reading my blog that way!!

If it makes any different I fell tired and slugish. It is amazing how food makes you feel.

But I have told you,so now I have come clean

So can we all move past this?

Two Pounds Down!

2008-07-27T06:49:00.000-07:00

Happy Dance!!

Today the scale says 299.1

It is day 5!

I am up early for the first time in forever! I am starting to get more energy.

Here it is.....I wondered last night about something....ready for this.

Did I have the fat person smell? You know what I mean. Do you want me to spell it out? You know not clean, sweaty and more descriptive words needed?

It started driving my CRAZY!

Is that Dumb?

This is just another motivator to make sure I look all this blubber.

Getting close up and personal with my fat.

2008-07-23T09:11:00.000-07:00

Day two.
Weight in 301.2

So far things are OK. It is easy ..so far. The two extra ounces are annoying but it's my first 24 hour period my body is in shock.
Veggies and Fish with no desert was a strange thing to my system. ( needing a little encouragement here...self motivating )

Looking in the mirror I did all the things that I avoid, so I never had to admit that I am really as fat and I am.

I waved my arms high in the air! GROSS we are talking something was waving back and it was soooooooo not pretty! Then I looked at my backs. No wonder my bra drives me nuts! The fat rolls are fighting for space like when you have to many 3 year olds on a bench, someone is wanting more room or pushing someone else out of thier spot!

NO I am not looking to put myself down I am getting real....REALLY REAL. This is the only way to lose the weight and change things. I like to confront thing head on!

Walking serious walking this is a random thought here but I will start that today!

Fat just plain F-A-T

2008-07-22T10:56:00.000-07:00

So this morning I woke up. I feel like someone ran me over with a truck. My muscles ache my head hurts, my feet HOLY SMOKES hurt when I touch the floor. I have to ROLL our of BED. Here comes AMY'S Stomach!

Then I go in the bathroom. I think hmm there is the scale. I step on it.
READY FOLKS???????????
301 POUNDS!!!!!!
That is FAT and I mean FAT! I am a walking heart attack, stoke, diabetes...wait did the diabetes while I was pregers...lets not get that again!
So what is my excuses let me tell you I have so many I could fill a Football Stadium.
The reality is that I like to eat. I love anything that is bad for you. I love it. I will eat anything and sometimes even when I think " This is only so so"

This means I need a to do something about it. I am talking like intervention here. I need to loss weight. I can not see me anymore in the HUGE fat mess!

NOW and I mean right now I am changing things and I need help so this blog comes to make me accountable. If there are eyes on me I will think twice about eating and more eating and then eating even more to that.

So if you know me and know people I know send them my blog so lots of people know my dirty (well not so secret) so lets call it shame) and I will do something about it.

DEAL????